Mediation / Arbitration

Some couples know their marriage is broken, are ready to move on, and know exactly what they want out of the other spouse and for their children. In ideal cases like this, they have an uncontested divorce. But couples who cannot see eye to eye on the terms of the divorce have a contested divorce,  and so usually go before a judge and let the court settle the issue. Recently, however a third way has opened up: mediation. Mediation tries to establish a common ground of discussion between spouses, and thus can offer more creative solutions when you and your spouse just can’t “work it out.”

Mediation offers a less stressful and comfortable environment in which to settle differences. You and your spouse meet in a simple office or conference room and an attorney well versed in the law acts–not as a judge–but as someone who has a stake in seeing that you both walk away satisfied.

Mediation covers all the same areas as divorce litigation: child support, child custody, allocation of debts and assets are matters you can expect to be discussed. The advantages of using mediation over divorce litigation are numerous:

• You represent yourself. Many divorcing couples report feelings of alienation in court proceedings, feelings that they’re not in the driver’s seat, feelings of being caught up in a process over which they have no control, even if they have a good lawyer. Even when they win! The sterile courtroom environment can seem arbitrary and impersonal.
• Mediation aims at a meeting of minds. Courtrooms are adversarial by definition, and mediation can provide a neutral and personalized environment in which to settle differences.
• All proceedings are confidential. Even if mediation doesn’t work, you can be assured that nothing that you say can be used against you in court. Your mediator is sworn to maintain confidentiality just like a regular attorney-client relationship.
• Cost effectiveness. This is arguably the biggest thing that people take away from mediation. Divorces are expensive and can take up to a year to pass through the courts. Wouldn’t it be better to take that money and put it towards the kids?
• Satisfaction. People who use mediation report that they feel more in control and more generally fulfilled after using mediation.
• Helps preserve a sense of family unity amidst a breakup. Because mediation consists of one on one meetings, there is less sense of win-loss that you get from litigation.

Remember, your mediator wants you to work things out, and is there solely to help you and your spouse find solutions without the intimidating feelings associated with courtrooms. Mediators know that courtrooms are inhospitable places, and should be considered the last place to settle differences. Mediation is a good choice for divorcing couples who are on good terms. Van Der Jagt Law Firm is a Denver Family Law firm that provides mediation services. For more information, call us for a free 30 minute, no-obligation consultation, or fill out the form for more information.